I recently cleaned out my inbox. It took 100 years. I deleted about 300 billion emails from guys who promised to show me how to make millions of dollars in my business if I would just give them my email address. I had never opened any of them. I should have unsubscribed, but I'm glad I didn't, because as I looked at them all lined up in a row in my inbox ready to be deleted, I noticed that the subject lines were hilarious.
- Donna, why didn't you do this? (I guess I didn't do what he wanted me to in the first email, so he sent me another one. This is one of the few headlines that actually made some sense!)
- Idiot savant reveals all tonight! (Like I want to learn from an idiot …)
- GREAT GOOGLEY MOOGLEY! (I don't want to know about anything that would make me use this phrase.)
- DUDE: This is CRAZY! (I am not a dude.)
- BRUTAL. (must watch) (The last thing I need is to watch something brutal. There's enough of it in my Facebook feed.)
- VERY IMPORTANT (please read) (Well, if it's not from my mom or my husband or my kids, I don't believe it's “very important.”)
- The best advice I could ever give you (Seriously?)
- boob-job currency (As a woman, I think I'm insulted.)
- new toys and fried chicken of death (cool app alert!) (I was just thinking about how I needed fried chicken and death.)
- DUMB MISTAKE (I make enough and don't need to know about yours.)
- Send elephant tranquilizers (please!) (I don't have any elephant tranquilizers. Since I cannot help you, I'm not opening.)
- SORRY! Never mind lol. Blew up the Internet. (Really? Then why am I still here?)
Speaking of Headlines
I've read a lot of blog posts about how to create compelling headlines for email newsletters and blog posts. I don't know about you, but I think it's pretty simple.
Use words that show your fans and friends that you can relate to them and have something of value to share with them.
I don't choose to open headlines because they are sensational, curious, or nonsensical — as many people recommend. I open them because they lead me to believe that an email will contain information that will actually be relevant to my life.
Interestingly, when I checked the emails I received from women, all of the headlines made sense. They were relevant to my life and I could actually tell what I would get if I opened them. I do have emails from some a few men that actually do make sense, and which I have opened and enjoyed. But they are the exception.
Not sure what to make of all of this, but the ones listed smacked of desperation to me. Almost like the people who sent them couldn't figure out how to be relevant, so they chose to be ridiculous instead.
I thought about writing them back and telling them what I think, but I'm not sure I want to invest the time. After all, they are the experts …
Best and Success!